— Vandoofus to Kahuna, on being prominently featured in UQ40.
Your liver would secede if it had that option.
— Kahuna's Tipsy Teddy Hypothesis.
Que? Speak English, man.
— Darth Teddy's Foreign Language Retort to Kahuna's Tipsy Teddy Hypothesis.
I would like to play something besides their hands.
— Vandoofus to Kahuna, expressing dubious desires after reviewing the Humanthesizer, consisting of fifteen bikini models.
What if someone sues your pants off?
— Kahuna to Vandoofus on the perils of roaming around without legal representation.
That's the irony: I am likely to need a lawyer when I am not with my lawyer.
— Vandoofus to Kahuna, admitting to a high potential for misbehavior when unrepresented.
How do I check? Throw a match in or something?
— Darth Teddy to Kahuna, on the correct procedure for examining one's tonsils.
You stand in front of a mirror, open your big mouth and shine a torch into the gaping darkness.
— Kahuna to Darth Teddy, outlining the more modern procedure recommended by five out of six otolaryngologists.
But, I should meet her in private.
— Vandoofus to Kahuna, on being told of a circus in honor of Her Royal Highness.
I knew Google was bad news.
— Vandoofus, learning of Kahuna applying facial recognition to His Picasa Web Albums.
Do you think parliament should meet under water?
— Kahuna to Vandoofus, noting an underwater cabinet meeting held in the Maldives.
Yes, but without diving equipment.
— Vandoofus, approving Kahuna's watery proposal with a proviso.
Why? Was Huggles chasing you?
— Kahuna, hearing of Vandoofus running two kilometers.
Er, is he here?
— Vandoofus to Kahuna, voicing grave concern on the current whereabouts of Huggles.
Fucking Dell rip-off; I am buying a Mac.
— Vandoofus to Kahuna, discovering after painstaking diagnosis that Harald Blatand was mysteriously unrepresented on his state-of-the-art Dell XPS 1310 notebook.
Are we presenting Teddy with an inappropriate gift?
— Her Royal Highness to Kahuna, plotting dubious deeds on the occasion of Darth Teddy's birthday.
So you chose Teddy over Doofi? Awww, he'll be hurt!
— Darth Teddy's Consort, learning of Kahuna choosing to deal with Teddy before Vandoofus.
Teddy is cuddlier.
— Kahuna, in his own defense.
Is there anyone you are interested in?
— Her Royal Highness, seeking to end Kahuna's unsupervised regime through dastardly means.
Other than your sibling?
— Kahuna to Her Royal Highness, seeking clarification.
Birthday sex.
— The Baron to Kahuna, defending an early return home on his birthday.
Just wish you were here too.
— The Baron to Kahuna, proposing a ménage à trois to celebrate his birthday.
Love this place; Gordon lives five minutes from everything.
— The Monster to Kahuna, disclosing the strategic co-location of Gordon's Lair from major amenities including the local Ben & Jerry's scoop shop.
Gordon has located himself at the center of the universe?
— Kahuna, alarmed at the Monster's latest revelations.
I haven't been able to consult my lawyer since Tuesday.
— Vandoofus to Kahuna, admitting to being sequestered by his parents.
I need to have a word with your mother.
— Vandoofus, threatening to invoke a higher power to deal with Kahuna.
Whom do you think your mother will believe? You or me?
— Kahuna to Vandoofus, retaliating by raising a point of credibility.
Was the frosting disallowed?
— Kahuna, learning of Gordon's confectionery intake being restricted to half a cupcake by his autonomous wife.
You expect us to believe that the plate moved on its own?
— Kahuna, attempting to implicate Gordon in a major earthquake in the South Pacific.
You are fortunate that you live in the jungle or you would not be very safe right now.
— Her Royal Highness, warning Kahuna of an imminent offensive.
Oh, you'll summon your contingent of dieting elephants?
— Kahuna, speculating on the precise nature of Her Royal Highness's threat.
I see you're still in the low-frequency noise phase.
— Kahuna, peeved at humming sounds made by Vandoofus.
Very well then, have pleasant dreams that involve neither my brother nor my husband.
— Her Royal Highness, imposing restrictions on Kahuna's REM sleep.
You're seriously limiting my options.
— Kahuna, expressing irritation at Her Royal Highness's restrictive dreaming regulations.
Gordon may well be experimenting with this kind of thing in his laboratory.
— Kahuna to the Monster, observing the explosive results of microwaving a large Electra Bulb.
Indeed, I intend to aid when I get there.
— The Monster to Kahuna, confirming a genetic predisposition towards pyrotechnics.
This rivalry with Batman has got to stop.
— Kahuna to the Monster, taking a dim view of escalating tensions between Gordon and the Caped Crusader.
I will no longer be the Fat One soon, buwahahaha!
— Gordon to Kahuna, announcing a self-imposed exercise regimen.
Holy crème brûlée, Fatman!
— Kahuna, sensing a great disturbance in the barycenter of the Earth-Gordon system.
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