Saturday, September 16, 2006

Hurricane Gordon Forms in Atlantic; Loses Steam Rapidly

WASHINGTON, District of Columbia -- The National Oceanic and Atmospheric Administration (NOAA) reported today that Hurricane Gordon, having formed in the Atlantic several days ago, had lost steam and was being downgraded to Category 2. The NOAA advisory added that Gordon was "meandering over the central Atlantic" and had been "drifting erratically over the past several hours."

Renegade climatologist Ebenezer Gordon is widely suspected to be the mastermind behind the storm. Unsurprisingly, the evil genius seems to have lost control of his creation completely, causing it to come to a halt about a thousand kilometers east of Bermuda.

Kahuna spoke to the press a short while ago and said He believed Gordon had bungled the rotational parameters of the storm thanks to a dubious interpretation of the Coriolis effect.

Kahuna added that Gordon's inability to muster sufficient numbers for his car wash scheme across Georgia had also put a damper on his hurricane. No stranger to disturbances in the troposphere, Gordon had previously demonstrated direct correlation between washing his former flagship automobile GITT Mk II, and inclement weather conditions. The water shortage plaguing Georgia has been partly responsible in confounding Gordon’s attempt to leverage this learning for criminal purposes.

Gordon was believed to be somewhere over the Atlantic in his personal blimp Fat One, mounting a last ditch attempt to regain control of his rapidly dissipating hurricane.

KNN will bring you live coverage of this turbulent story.

1 comment:

Big Kahuna said...

NOAA reports that "Gordon refuses to weaken" in advisory 27, indicating sinister forces at work in the north Atlantic, possibly operating from a large blimp X-(