Colombo 7, Sri Lanka (ENN) - In a breaking news flash received last month, Vandoofus’s Intel has released a statement saying the agency has picked up increasing chatter relating to Kahuna’s relationship with an unnamed companion. In earlier reports, Kahuna was reported seen in public with a member of the opposite sex believed to be Kahuna’s better half. Vandoofus’s Intel chief has put one and one together and concluded that the unnamed companion is the female better half (female + better half = female better half). After this brilliant piece of intelligence work, Vandoofus’s Intel chief, has been promoted to the post of Senior Chief of Vandoofus Intel, a post recently vacated by Condi Rice to become the worst ever defense secretary in the US history. Kahuna who was available for comments did not specifically deny any of the Intel reports but said "I did not have sex with that woman". The reason for Kahuna strange reaction is still unclear. Meanwhile, Vandoofus has offered a reward of 1 million Turkish Lira to anyone who can upload a photograph of the suspected female better half. (Taxes and other restrictions may apply. The recipient must be 18 years or older and hold a valid drivers license Turkey, Turkmenistan or Kazakhstan.)
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