Gordon in Cuba for Secret Talks

Gordon poses with Castro and Arafat after talks at the Palace of the Revolution in Havana

HAVANA, Republic of Cuba -- News leaked from the Cuban capital earlier today has bared secret talks between Cuban President Fidel Castro Ruz and crackpot inventor Professor Gordon. Sources wishing to remain anonymous divulged that Castro had offered Gordon the post of Chief Scientist, with a mandate to build a working model of a 1955 Chevy carburetor.

Experts were quick to caution the move saying that, while Gordon had an explosive history with polarity-reversed capacitors, his mechanical aptitude was untested with internal combustion engines. "This whole thing could blow up," they warned adding that a Cuban Carburetor Crisis could be brewing.

Gordon was last seen in the hills of Sri Lanka attempting to trip the Earth Orbit Interference (EOI) threshold by walking a Hamiltonian path around the faculty buildings at the Peradeniya University. This plan had apparently been foiled by the Vice Chancellor's Gardener when he had cleverly diverted Gordon into a lily pond.

It was not immediately clear if Gordon had accepted the job, although, he did pose for a sketch with Castro and visiting Palestinian President Yassar Arafat. Arafat's visit was not believed to be linked to the carburetor agenda.

When accosted, Gordon refused comment, but did say he was visiting Santiago de Cuba for a vacation. A spokesman for President Castro vehemently denied the report and blamed it on a negative publicity campaign launched by Cuban dissidents in Miami.