False Prophet Plunged into Darkness

KENDALIYADDAPALUWA, Ganemulla -- Greater Kendaliyaddapaluwa was plunged into darkness Saturday due to inclement weather. Initial reports from the region suggest that the False Prophet El Gordo was not responsible for the crisis. The Regional One of the Ceylon [Electricity] Board took a decidedly Newtonian view and explained the technical reasons behind the debacle saying "maha line eka wetila." He did not reveal any immediate plans to pick it up. Electricity was restored Sunday, minutes after the Monster reported the situation to Kahuna.